GRACES
Part - III
PRONUNCIATION IN SPEECH
TO acquire a
graceful utterance, read aloud to some friend every day, and beg of him to
interrupt and correct you whenever you read too fast, do not observe the proper
stops, lay a wrong emphasis, or utter your words unintelligibly. You may even
read aloud to yourself, and tune your utterance to your own ear. Take care to
open your teeth when you read or speak, and articulate every word distinctly;
which last cannot be done, but by sounding the final letter. But, above all,
study to vary your voice according to the subject, and avoid monotony. Daily
attention to these articles will in a little time render them easy and habitual
to you.
The voice
and manner of speaking, too, are not to be neglected: some people almost shut their
mouth when they speak, and mutter so that they are not to be understood; others
speak so fast and sputter, that they are not to be understood neither: some
always speak as loud as if they were talking to deaf people; and others so low
that one cannot hear them. All these habits are awkward and disagreeable, and
are to be avoided by attention: they are the distinguishing mark of the
ordinary people, who have had no care taken of their education. You cannot imagine
how necessary it is to mind all these little things; for I have seen many
people, with great talents, ill received for want of having these talents; and
others well received, only from their little talents, and who had no great
ones.
SPELLING
ORTHOGRAPHY, or spelling well, is so absolutely
necessary for a man of letters, or a gentleman, that one false spelling may fix
ridicule on him for the remainder of his life. Reading carefully will
contribute, in a great measure, to preserve you from exposing yourself by false
spelling; for books are generally well-spelled, according to the orthography of
the times. Sometimes words, indeed, are spelled differently by different
authors; but those instances are rare; and where there is only one way of spelling
a word, should you spell it wrong, you will be sure to be ridiculed. Nay, a woman
of a tolerable education would despise and laugh at her lover, if he should
send her an ill-spelled billet-doux.
STYLE
STYLE is the dress of thoughts; and let them be ever so
just, if your style is homely, coarse, and vulgar, they will appear to as much
disadvantage, and be as ill received, as your person, though ever so well
proportioned, would, if dressed in rags, dirt, and tatters. It is not every
understanding that can judge of matter; but every ear can and does judge more
or less of style.
Mind your diction, in whatever language
you either write or speak: contract a habit of correctness and elegance.
Consider your style, even in the freest conversation and most familiar letters.
After, at least, if not before, you have said a thing, reflect if you could not
have said it better.
WRITING
EVERY man who has the use of his eyes and his right
hand, can write whatever hand he pleases. Nothing is so ungentlemanlike as a
schoolboy’s scrawl. I do not desire you to write a stiff, formal hand, like
that of a schoolmaster, but a genteel, legible, and liberal character, and to
be able to write quick. As to the correctness and elegancy of your writing,
attention to grammar does the one, and to the best authors the other.
Epistolary correspondence should be easy and natural, and convey to the persons
just what we would say if we were with them.
VULGAR
EXPRESSIONS
VULGARISM in language is a certain characteristic of
bad company and a bad education. Proverbial expressions and trite sayings are
the flowers of the rhetoric of a vulgar man. Would he say, that men differ in
their taste; he both supports and adorns that opinion, by the good old saying,
as he respectfully calls it, that “what is one man’s meat is another man’s poison.”
If anybody attempts being smart, as he calls it, upon him, he gives them
tit for tat, ay, that he does. He has always some favorite word for the
time being; which, for the sake of using often, he commonly uses; such as vastly
angry, vastly kind, vastly handsome, and vastly ugly. Even
his pronunciation of proper words carries the mark of the beast along with it.
He calls the earth, yearth; he is obleeged, not obliged,
to you. He goes to wards, and not towards, such a place. He
sometimes affects hard words, by way of ornament, which he always mangles like
a learned woman. A man of fashion never has recourse to proverbs and vulgar
aphorisms; uses neither favorite words nor hard words; but takes great care to
speak very correctly and grammatically, and to pronounce properly; that is,
according to the usage of the best companies.
CAUTIONS
AGAINST SUNDRY ODD HABITS
HUMMING a tune within ourselves, drumming with our
fingers, making a noise with our feet, and such awkward habits, being all
breaches of good manners, are therefore indications of our contempt for the
persons present, and consequently should not be practiced.
Eating very quick, or very slow, is
characteristic of vulgarity: the former infers poverty; the latter, if abroad,
that you are disgusted with your entertainment; and if at home, that you are
rude enough to give your friends what you cannot eat yourself. Eating soup with
your nose in the plate is also vulgar. So likewise in smelling to the meat
while on the fork, before you put it in your mouth. If you dislike what is sent
upon your plate, leave it; but never, by smelling to or examining it, appear to
tax your friend with placing unwholesome provisions before you.
Spitting on the floor or carpet is a
filthy practice, and which, were it to become general, would render it as
necessary to change the carpets as the tablecloths: not to add, it will induce
our acquaintance to suppose, that we have not been used to genteel furniture:
for which reason alone, if for no other, a man of liberal education should
avoid it.
To conclude this article: never walk fast
in the streets, which is a mark of vulgarity, ill befitting the character of a
gentleman or a man of fashion, though it may be tolerable in a tradesman.
To stare any person full in the face, whom
you may chance to meet, is an act also of ill-breeding; it would seem to
bespeak as if you saw something wonderful in his appearance; and is, therefore,
a tacit reprehension.
Keep
yourself free, likewise, from all odd tricks or habits; such as scratching
yourself, putting your fingers in your mouth, nose, and ears, thrusting out
your tongue, snapping your fingers, biting your nails, rubbing your hands,
sighing aloud, an affected shivering of your body, gaping, and many others,
which I have noticed before; all which are imitations of the manners of the
mob, and degrading to a gentleman.
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